Sick. And. Hopeless.


Distraction. Something that diverts our attention from what’s bothering us to other else. Once in a while, we need some breather to calm down our nerves and renew our spirit and energy to enable us to function normally and with a full blast of energy again. And that’s one thing i badly needed right now.

I went home. Again. The main reason is because I feel like giving up. I feel hopeless. I’m stressed and I’m too burnt out. And one more thing I’m sure about, I’m sick. Not just an ordinary disease but i guess it’s a major thing. There are times that I feel like it’s the end of my life. Times that I become too emotional to the point that I made a ‘goodbye note’ just in case it was indeed my last day on Earth. There are moments like the world is pushing me to be very expressive with my emotions to my loved ones. Moments that I need to breathe deeply and try to relax. Moments that I need to think through life and meditate if I did had a good one, and if it is enough reason for God to depart me from the world.

Life. These instances reminds me that I’m a human being and life indeed is not just a bed of roses. There will always be times like this. The problem with me is that I feel like I’ve had enough. I used to be a strong young lady who tries to build a facade to mask my real emotion from others. But at this moment, I need a distraction to renew my lost strength and perseverance. I need more of God cos He is my mitochondria.

I went home because I want to be in a place away from school. A place away from stress. A place away from problems. And a place away from restlessness. I hate the thought of school now. This may be triggered by that HRM 130 experience or because of the unending Strategic Management Case Marathon. But I guess, everything that I’m undergoing right now might be because of pressure. Pressure from graduating, getting a good job, and meeting expectations. Ugh, those things. -.- I never want society to dictate who I should be. I never planned to adhere to the society’s beliefs especially if I’m against it. I will be who I wanted myself to be. But before that, let’s have a little bit of distraction.


About missrandoom

I'm into photography but I'm a no pro. Capturing the best things life has to offer is my hobby. :)
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