Throwback :)

  
New year has started but I decided to take a few minutes to look back of how life has been on 2015.  

<j>I started the year contrary to the family tradition and Philippine culture. I was miles away from the family to celebrate the new year alone. It was an act of bravery in aim to embrace independence. But no, it was a failed attempt because I’ve decided to never do it again. 
January was a bittersweet month. It was the mark of an end of a chapter on my career but at the same time it was a beginning of hope. It was the first time I traveled with acquaintances with no map on hand, no itinerary, and no whatnot of the place we’re headed. Not to mention how we got stranded on the island with no extra cash, no ATM machine and no money transfer branches open. Challenge, hmm. Now that’s what I call adventure –  what I’m always craving for. And first thing in the year, I’ve took hold of. Bliss. 
Moving on to the following months have been agonizingly slow but leisurely. With no job and no commitments at hand, I’ve got the sweet opportunity to bask on my hobbies. I’ve read quite a lot of books and had a few adventures around. Mind you, reading was at hands grasp but not traveling cos well, I don’t have luxury of free flow of finances from being employed. The tight budget has it perks too. I got to travel only within the city but it brought me to some unexplored and untouched natural resources. Plus, a free ride too courtesy of my also adventurous dad. Oh the perks of it running along our blood. 
On summer, Bohol-Cebu land tour was next on the family’s itinerary. And boy was it tiring! Haha Kidding aside, it was worth a throwback. With my first time on snorkeling adventure along the edge of Cabilao’s sea cliff (idk how to call it, sorry) to the mini-boaracay beach of Anda! Though I wasn’t able to travel along South Cebu with them cos I had to cut it short due to some career opportunities. 
Come May and hello to my new career! Business development officer, uh-huh. The best thing about being employed to the company was dude, they sure know how to pamper young employees: Company tours and trips with unlimited supply of foods, all on the house! Fast forward to date, I’m blessed to have been part of the Bluewater Sumilon Cebu plus whale shark watching (my 2nd time) and Dapitan trip. Plus the Strat Planning at Alta Cebu and the oh-so-luxurious Christmas party at Shangri-La. Let’s not forget all the after office parties *wink πŸ™‚ 
A short overview of my other, unpublished activities a month after being employed made my life a whole lot challenging… and exhausting. But fulfilling. Yes, definitely fulfilling.
Fast forward to December and hooray, I’ve got the privilege to enjoy a long Christmas to New Year break! Cheers to more of this on the years ahead! πŸ™‚ 

Now, history is yet about to repeat itself. But with a twist. Same month, January. But new twist, academics. Let’s see how this year would be. </j>

 

 
  

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Life is too short. :)

 
Previous chapter has ended. New chapter began… And is soon to end.

Life is too short not to travel. Life is too short not to explore. Lif is too short not to live the moments. And life is too short to suffer when you know you have the means to escape. Life is too short to be choked with something. Life is too short to not take a risk. 

Life is too short. So live your life as how you want it to be.
                                                                 ———————

A side note though, on why I decided to update my feed. I’ve scanned thru my apps and realized that it’s been quite awhile since I last posted here. Just to put on some inputs on my online diary, it’s been months since I’ve been employed as a Business Development Officer in a certain diversified Holdings Company. To summarize my stay in the company in a sentence, I’d say: It was exhausting and stressful yet fun, exciting and fulfilling at the same time. 
  

The best thing in the company is that the youths share the same passion: travel and adventure. It becomes more exciting when the company shares the same, which ends up giving its employees a free hitch to heaven. 

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Realtime Reflection :)

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“Twas like traveling the road of a rural area to an undiscovered paradise.” That one phrase exactly reflects my sentiments on my first job experience.

Frustrated. Seriously, I dont know where I stand now. Im sandwiched. I want to have my career in this bustling city but no doubt I wont be able to pull it off without sacrificing my health. UP was indeed the best thing that happened to me knowing full well how it notch up my opportunities and somehow eliminate selected limitations in the coroporate world. But I wonder how could have my health be if I didn’t enter UP? Perhaps I’ve pushed myself beyond my limits resulting to where I am now. But honestly, I guess Im lost because I haven’t talked and listened to Him for quite some time now. I guess I’m simply physically, emotionally and spiritually malnourished in this period of time. The sad part is, I know but Im not doing anything. This life is pointing nowhere near where I want it to be. And I just feel so helpless. My academic background and my shortlived experience in the retail industry is willing to take me higher than where Im currently soaring but my health isnt just cooperating. Why am I in this situation? Personally, I am fine. But why is science against me? Why are my results not where as we expect it to be? Being resistant is just too much to fathom but wherever this leads me, I just hope that its somewhere I could freely be myself. Somewhere my parents and sister would be proud of what im doing, not ashamed and whatsoever. Honestly, Im hurt. I’ve had my sentiments with working at the mall before but knowing such position and those numerous and stressful responsibilities, and well dealing with such job at such an early age — with no prior experience, I’ve learnt to be proud of myself and my petty accomplishments. Trust me, the job was in some way discriminating but at the end of the day, it seems like I’ve reached self-actualization of Maslow’s theory. Yes, Im satisfied at that. Judge all you want. At this point of life, Im no longer in the right mind to think rationally and logically.

This sentiments might be the result of separation anxiety. Ive been attached to my staffs. Five months with approximately 9 hours per day with them brought good relationship, connection and camaraderie among us. I’ve been attached to my job. I miss it. Decision-making was stressful but it was a fulfilling job. I miss all the stresses. But I also miss this freedom and relaxed life I have now. I missed this lifestyle. So I might as well embrace everything I have now and take advantage of this awesome life. Till then.

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Blessed and Loved :)

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Life is a matter of choice, they say. It is a matter of learning how to take advantage of the opportunities. It takes perseverance and motivation. But apart from God, life is meaningless. You may have all the riches, but there’s still a hole that needs to be filled out in your life. And it’s only God who could satisfy that.

Just got back from my month-long training in Metro Manila and there’s one thing that I realized: God wants me to start humbly. He’s always been hinting me about it but I never figured it out not until last week. I’ve been hearing His word for the past month and all He says is “You are mine, do not worry. I have plans, hope and a good future in store for you. Just trust in me. Stay with me and you’d be more fruitful.” Seriously, these passages always talks to me over and over again. Every time I listen to podcasts, read my bible, hear His message and listen to Christian songs, these comprises the same message.

Here goes a rundown of my life for the past month: I stopped applying for job right after the coke incident. I was hopeless. But then, after I was informed that I’d be staying in Cebu with my sister, I tried to apply. I stumbled upon Suyen Corporation who immediately responded with my application and scheduled me for an interview. I was very blessed to pass through the process up until the final interview. It was during the processing of requirements that I became afraid again. But I prayed to God that if the job is for me, then the process would be too smooth and easy. And voila! I was given around 2 weeks to process but I finished everything in less than 3 days! I am indeed favored. NBI, SSS and PhilHealth together with Pag-ibig and Medical are never a good combo when time pressured but the provision I had was overwhelming. πŸ™‚

I was sent to Manila for training. But the day before and after my departure, I felt discouraged. With Mom and Dad’s comment about the job, I feel like I’m not in the right track. That the job does not suit me. Im a BS Mgt graduate of of a prestigious university and I just end up working in a mall store?! Although my position is as the Store Supervisor, “Something’s wrong”, they say. So I went to God and ask Him what now? What should I do? But well, I was reminded that this job was from Him. I was not planing in getting a job cos I was hopeless but I did pray to be employed and this opportunity came. More so, the favor and provision given to me during the process was enough sign. This job is for me. It bridges the gap between me, my achievements and my future. God did not necessarily mean that by landing in this job, I’d forever be at this level. No. I’m taking baby steps. It’s the road to success. Start small. I’m out not to please anybody but to please God. I should dare to be different.

Mind you, the training was never easy. It’s not just about lectures and discussions. Being one of the trainee does not entitle you of a sure job, in fact, we have exams on technical training, store immersion evaluation and panel. An average grade of 85% is necessary to pass the training. I’m an introvert so the store immersion was my weakness. I’m not comfortable with Tagalog so I have difficulties in communication so I speak English there most of the time. During the panel, I was literally shaking and I’m never outstanding in decision-making especially with situational problems. But all I prayed was “God, if this is You, let it be smooth.” I actually did not pray to pass, I just said “let Your will be done”. I even asked my friends to pray for me in such way. And yes, I passed. It was indeed Him from the very beginning. I’m bound to take the road less taken. But I shouldn’t worry because this is His plan for me and His plans are always way better than mine.

(God’s instruments in speaking to me: Who Am I by Casting Crowns, I Know Who I Am by Israel Houghton ft Chris Tomlin, Your Love is Everything by Jesus Culture, Jeremiah 29:11, Ecclesiastes 1, John 15:1-2, Philippians 2:3, Romans 8:28, Pastor Carlo Panlilio of Destiny Church, Pastor Manny Santiago- guest Pastor of Praise Cathedral, Pastor Sumrall of Cathedral of Praise)

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Bittersweet Goodbye :)

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Another chapter of my life has recently ended and that simply implies another new beginning for the forthcoming chapter. College would be the most life-changing event of my life. It taught me a lot of indispensable life lessons and it molded me to an independent individual whose wise enough which responsibilities should be the priority. It developed us to adopt the ‘can-do attitude’ that no matter how excruciatingly nerve-wrecking the tasks-at-hand are, nothing could keep us from successfully fulfilling it.

Going back in high school, I never had a plan of going to which university because back then, all I thought of were Korean and Japanese dramas and anything associated with the word FUN. I never once planned where would I go after high school graduation and what course should I take. All I knew was that I have been destined to study in Silliman University in Dumaguete City where all of the members of the family in my father’s side had a taste of education. I mean, no one would ever bid farewell to their academic lives unless they’ve been to Silliman — that’s the ‘family tradition’. Since I, on the other hand, had no clear direction of which path to take, I thought, “well, why not? After all, it’s a good university”. Also, back then, I know no other university other than Silliman and the local community colleges in our place though I took random entrance exams of any university that markets themselves in our campus. So imagine the mixed emotion I got when I passed the UPCAT. Wow, that was it. The university that could match Siliman’s credibility and serves as my ticket to spending four years of college independently in the metro.

It was incredibly difficult to decide which path to take. It would absolutely define the my future much more the life I’m going to live. It took a lot of persuasion especially to Dad who was at the time, working in Canada. It was basically hard for him to let go of my opportunity to study in the University of the Philippines and at the same time let go of the family tradition of studying in Siliman. The decision process became more complicated when I went to UP Cebu and had a ‘not-so-welcoming’ vibes from the OSA department regarding my application for the STFAP which we thought was not optional and part of the enrollment process. I tried to convince Dad to allow me to enroll in University of San Carlos but it seems like I’m only given two options — UP or SU. So yea, I took a leap of faith and conquered the overly chaotic enrollment procedures of UP Cebu. The rest then became history. Now, here I am. A certified Iskolar ng Bayan who wore her very own hard-earned Sablay last April 30, 2014 with none other my ever favorite Senator Miriam Defensor-Santiago as the commencement speaker. That was probably the best moment of my life that elapsed like a blur, thank God there are video cameras that recorded every moment of it.

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One thing that everyone reminds us is that we are the graduates of UP, an iskolar ng bayan. And we have a lot of opportunities open for us not to enhance our lives but to act for the betterment of the society whom we are indebted for the subsidized tuition we received.

There will definitely be a lot of memories I’m going to miss. Waking up 30 minutes before classes starts and scrambling myself to be in class within the 15-minute grace period, eating brunch or sometimes bruncher (breakfast+lunch+dinner) all-in-one because we don’t have the luxury of time to do so and the list continuos indefinitely. But the most highlighted of all that I guess every Isko and Iska could relate is staying up until midnight just to wait for the ever-so-frustrating CRSIS to enlist subjects and end up actually not saving a slot because the system won’t allow you due to some technical difficulties. And much more the prolonged agonies and nervousness in checking out our CRSIS accounts every end of the semester to see our grades whether we passed or fail. Nothing could ever beat the overwhelming feeling of passing a disastrous subject much more the ecstasy of knowing you qualified as a college scholar.

Being a Management student have perks of its own especially having an adviser as cool and awesome as Madame Busano. Who could ever forget the long lines for enrollment consultation and strictly following your schedule or else you are tasked to submit a letter for reconsideration for assessment. She may be as strict and meticulous as that but she’s the most loving, caring and understanding adviser I’d ever have. I may have taken her for granted especially during class discussions but that doesn’t lessen the respect and admiration I have for her for being an outstanding adviser. And oh! Corporate mondays and case presentations! Geez, girl problems —– The dilemma of thinking what to wear during those days. I’m not the fashionista-kind-of-girl so I don’t have endless supply of those corporate attire.
And speaking of case studies, the literally sleepless nights, stinky days and internal conflicts over solving those tricky and complicated case problems will never be forgotten. How much more the strategic ninja moves in printing procrastinated requirements by having “paper-relay” with groupmates ready to run in different designated ‘stations’ from the GP rooms to Computerun.

Because of the numerous lessons I’ve learned in UP, I can’t remember anything to post here. Nyahaha kidding! Anyway, I’ll simply share my secret to surpassing all the academic hurdles I’ve been to in UP. Hard work and perseverance are one of the key ingredients but nothing beats the intensity of God’s word in inspiring and motivating me to continue, move forward and never ever give up cos nothing is impossible. Here are the verses that I always keep in mind especially before every presentation and exam.

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. (James 1:5 NIV)

The Lord will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty, to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands. You will lend to many nations but will borrow from none. The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom. (Deuteronomy 28:12, 13 NIV)

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, β€œplans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

Being a follower of Christ doesn’t exempt you from troubles, challenges and difficulties. It simply gives you a ticket to have the confidence to surpass these struggles with your faith in God and by holding on to His promises.

Blessed to have an awesome God who helped me throughout my 4 years in college. Indeed, having God doesn’t mean I will never face any challenges. Instead, it meant that I’m stronger than I used to be because I have the ever powerful God who’s my strength when I am weak.

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Sick. And. Hopeless.

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Distraction. Something that diverts our attention from what’s bothering us to other else. Once in a while, we need some breather to calm down our nerves and renew our spirit and energy to enable us to function normally and with a full blast of energy again. And that’s one thing i badly needed right now.

I went home. Again. The main reason is because I feel like giving up. I feel hopeless. I’m stressed and I’m too burnt out. And one more thing I’m sure about, I’m sick. Not just an ordinary disease but i guess it’s a major thing. There are times that I feel like it’s the end of my life. Times that I become too emotional to the point that I made a ‘goodbye note’ just in case it was indeed my last day on Earth. There are moments like the world is pushing me to be very expressive with my emotions to my loved ones. Moments that I need to breathe deeply and try to relax. Moments that I need to think through life and meditate if I did had a good one, and if it is enough reason for God to depart me from the world.

Life. These instances reminds me that I’m a human being and life indeed is not just a bed of roses. There will always be times like this. The problem with me is that I feel like I’ve had enough. I used to be a strong young lady who tries to build a facade to mask my real emotion from others. But at this moment, I need a distraction to renew my lost strength and perseverance. I need more of God cos He is my mitochondria.

I went home because I want to be in a place away from school. A place away from stress. A place away from problems. And a place away from restlessness. I hate the thought of school now. This may be triggered by that HRM 130 experience or because of the unending Strategic Management Case Marathon. But I guess, everything that I’m undergoing right now might be because of pressure. Pressure from graduating, getting a good job, and meeting expectations. Ugh, those things. -.- I never want society to dictate who I should be. I never planned to adhere to the society’s beliefs especially if I’m against it. I will be who I wanted myself to be. But before that, let’s have a little bit of distraction.

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The Best Two Days Ever :)

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Ecstatic. The overwhelming feeling a person could ever get after spending quality time with his/her special loved ones.

Two days. Two unusual, exciting, hectic, exhausting but awesome days. That’s how I define my ‘adventure’ this weekend. I went back home because my ever-so-cool friends are having a field trip in my hometown. Honestly, I was in a dilemma on whether I’d go or not considering the expenses I’ve accumulated the previous week after being stranded due to the typhoon. However, the thought of home+family+friends is just so tempting that I failed to resist. πŸ™‚ Who could give up that opportunity without ever regretting? Well, as for me, I hate the feeling of missing a literally once in a lifetime opportunity so I grabbed it while I could.

Dividing my time was the most difficult task. I wanted to join the adventures of my friends while touring our place and at the same time, spend quality time with my family since technically, I went home for both reasons. And, I guess I was successful. πŸ™‚

I had fun. Laughed a lot. All credits goes to my friends and family for this awesome weekend. Was so glad cos Dad allowed me, for the first time, to use the car. Waaaaah, that feeling of having someone trust your driving skills. Nyahaha!

Words are not enough to describe how thankful and blessed I feel. If given the chance of knowing the last 2 days of my temporal existence here on earth, I’d definitely spend it like how I did this weekend. All praises and glory to the unquestionably most loving Father God for giving me this very early graduation gift. The best ever. Like ever.

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Hooray for Today! ;)

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Stranded. Life will always be unpredictable no matter how strategic you planned it to be.

That’s one thing I learned after being stranded in one of my trips. Fortuitous events should always be considered in creating a plan and that’s one thing I never thought of on this journey. Ugh, bad weather was so kj -.- However, despite those things, I’ve encouraged myself to look at the bright side. I was able to roam around Dumaguete and had a chance to become an ‘amateur backpacker’. Nyahaha, so much for daydreaming of being a travel blogger :3 It would have been a lot better if I was able to hang out with some of my Dumaguete-based friends and relatives.

After the storm signal #2 in Negros and Cebu was revoked, instead of continuing my adventure to Dapitan, I decide to head back to Cebu. Through Landtrip! Yey! My favorite! πŸ™‚ While boarding, I realized how much I really love traveling and how passionate I am to be able to travel to an unknown place and learn its culture. Waaaaah, I’m so excited to explore places. I saw several foreign and even local backpackers and I just simply see myself as one in the future. I’m just still trying to figure out how to live that kind of life without compensating the opportunities of success in the corporate world. πŸ˜‰ Oh well.

Photo above was taken somewhere in Oslob, Cebu after my 20-minute ferry ride from Negros. It’s as if no tropical storm passed by that place a day before. The weather’s perfect and makes me look forward for summer. πŸ™‚

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LAST SHOT. :)

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Hello from the Christmas Capital of the Philippines! πŸ™‚

Last post before the year ends. πŸ™‚ Yes, I’m guilty of always leaving this blog behind. I tend to forget about this most of the times especially when I’m in Cebu because I always get occupied with academic stuffs, etc. So I’m hoping that ‘missrandoom’ won’t get jealous because at least, before the year ends, I remembered her. πŸ˜‰

This year has been one of the best years of my life. Yes, occasional life dramas come my way but thank God, He is always there to back me up. 0:) It’s on 2013 that I got most active in blogging. I might not be able to constantly post but compared to last year, I had more blogposts this year. This blog was primarily made to burst my bubbles about how ugly my life was at that time. Yes, if you backtrack, my first few posts were actually about my rants towards the imperfections of our family. But eventually, this blog evolved and became a photoblog with some of my insights on random things. πŸ™‚ I never intended to tell anyone about the URL of this blog (I just told them I had one) but my closest friends are just undeniably awesome that they were able to locate this. Nyahaha πŸ™‚ Anyway, I’m very thankful to the 100+ followers I have, I don’t personally know any one of you because most (if not all) are foreigners but despite that, I always feel ecstatic knowing that someone unknown followed this blog. Honestly, I didn’t know that ‘followers’ and ‘likes’ exist here cos when I joined wordpress, I didn’t surf around. I actually just opened this account for blogging. Nothing more, nothing less. So when I first received an email about someone liking my post and following my blog, I was literally shocked. Hahaha!

More pictures from the Christmas village:

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Thank you 2013 and cheers for 2014! πŸ™‚

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Balance :)

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Life is not just about being selfless and setting everyone else as your priority, it is also about meditating on your life and providing time for yourself β€” a balance of both could make you feel more contented and free.

It’s hopefully my last semester in college and I’m so ecstatic that I get to enroll in a basic photography class! It’s nothing much, not the typical nerve-wrecking subject but it’s more of an appreciation subject. I’m simply too excited to learn and our professor is so awesome that despite my record of tardiness, it never crossed my mind to skip his class. The photo above is just one of the pictures I submitted in class and my favorite so far. Yes, I know I’m not a pro but at least I got a good shot. πŸ˜‰

Anyway, balance. It’s something I’m aiming right now. Since it’s my last semester as a student *fingers-crossed, I want it to be the best. I’m planning to have a balanced lifestyle: education-health-work-social. I’m actually exhausted with all the cases and academic stuffs thrown at us so I’m simply taking time and relaxing a bit on this aspect. Also, I’m into exercising right now especially after I fainted last month. Being skinny would be better if you have a toned body, I guess. So I’m doing my share of exercise once in a while. πŸ˜‰ I’m also currently having a part-time job and it’s overwhelming to buy my wants from my hard-earned salary. In fact, the converse shoes in the picture above is a product of my hardwork. πŸ™‚ lastly, I want to spend a lot of time with college friends considering that in less than 5months time, it’d hard to meet with our busy work schedules (assuming we’d get employed right after we graduate. πŸ™‚ But, I’m quite certain with this. God’s willing.)

After all, life is not just about the quantitative achievements (i.e. Grade) you attained in school. It’s about how you manage to use those knowledge in the next chapters of your life. Graduating from college is a big accomplishment, but it is just the first step to success. There are still a lot of mistakes to make and a lot of paths to take before we could actually reach self-fulfillment. Therefore, we just need to enjoy the journey because it takes too long before we reach our destination. πŸ™‚

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